I'm at risk!

It hit me the other day, there is another person close to me who I would die for if there was something I could do that might prevent his being hurt.

I was holding my grandson Oliver, and I realized that the net of those who I care deeply for has spread.

Now, I don’t know what the odds are of my being killed by putting myself in harms way as a substitute for someone else, I imagine the odds are very low.

But it has just hit me that the odds of this happening have to increase the more my children breed.

Do my children realise what risk they are putting me in if they think of having children?

Oliver is the only grandchild so far – I think I have a good chance of not meeting an unfortunate end protecting him – but I need to talk to my children about what they are doing to my chances of a long life if they have any more children, for I know that if an out of control car was heading towards anyone in my family circle I would do what I could to protect them, even if that meant shielding them from the worst of the impact. I wouldn’t think about it – there wouldn’t be time – I would just do it.

I know I would give my life for any of them because to a degree I already have.

I am sure that my life has already been shortened by a few years through the fear and anxiety I have suffered as my children have weathered the storms of life.

When I am not thinking of my life ending prematurely, because of out of control motor vehicles careering towards them, I figure that a few years less life at the end of my life when I might be frail and more incoherent than I am now might not be the worst thing – so I suffer this possibility accordingly and hope for a good number of years yet.

But the addition of Oliver into the family circle has got me worried. I am now at risk!